Where's Your Golfer?

It seems I am always leaving things lying around where they do not belong - the kids' iPads, the kitchen scissors, my bra.  I can appreciate that at times this has caused my family great frustration.  You would think, however, that if it were mom's personal items left lying around mom's personal space, no harm or laughter would come of it.  Wrong!

It was just another day.  I was puttering around the upstairs doing the usual things - picking up clothes, folding clothes, putting away clothes.  From the corner of my eye I spied my young son walk into my bedroom and then proceed into the ensuite.  That was nothing new.  For whatever reason, peeing in my bathroom was far more exciting than using the one that he shared with his sister.

"What's this?"

I entered my room and found my son holding the instructions on how to insert one Playtex-GentleGlide-SPORT for Active Lifestyles tampon.  I knew the instructions had fallen to the floor the last time I'd reached into the box and, honestly, I hadn't cared.  Instead of picking them up and throwing them in the garbage, I had chosen to walk over them - repeatedly.

"Oh Brennen," I said, waving a hand dismissively in the air, "it's just something for mommy."

Right away the look on his face told me that that answer was not going to suffice.

"But what is it?" he persisted.

Okay, I needed an answer that was evasive enough to avoid the whole tampon-vagina conversation, yet believable enough to satisfy a four-year-old’s curiosity.

"Instructions, Brennen.  Those are instructions for how to put something together."

My son walked over beside me and put the paper on the bed.

Upon closer examination he turned, and eyeing me suspiciously challenged, "Where's your golfer?"